The Fucks In THE FLUX: The Statistical Analysis You've All Been Waiting For

(NOTE: Based on time elapsed since the posting of this entry, the BS-o-meter calculates this is 4.824% likely to be something that Ferrett now regrets.)

I have long claimed that The Flux is a bigger, better sequel to my book Flex – but doubtlessly, you’re all wondering about that one unassailable hallmark of quality:
How many times does Ferrett swear in The Flux?
If you’ll recall, my favorite review for Flex came from my Goddaughter Carolyn, who said “I would recommend this book to people ages 15+ because f*** is in the book on almost every page.”
Further investigation turned up that Flex contained the word “fuck” 95 times,  or roughly once every three pages.  (Most of that is from Valentine. She swears a lot.)  (Also, my friend Angie noted with amusement that I proceeded to toss off three more “fucks” in the acknowledgements like it was no big thang.)
So if The Flux really is bigger and better than Flex, should it not have more fucks in The Flux?  I did a little survey, and the answer is:
Yes!  The Flux is fuck-superior to Flex, with 101 fucks.  Fuckmathematically speaking, The Flux is 6.3% bigger than Flex.
…but honestly, my friends, I feel like you deserve better than statistical jiggery-pokery.  The truth is that The Flux is also a longer novel than Flex, so if you’re qualifying quantity as fuck-density, we’re still averaging the same rate of roughly one “fuck” every three pages.
But hey.  The Flux has origamimancers, culinomancers, bookiemancers, [REDACTED]mancers, [EVEN MORE HEAVILY REDACTED]mancers, Valentine falling in love, Aliyah learning to kill, Paul learning to fight dirty, and of course more heavily implied pegging scenes.
So it’s bigger in the ways that count.  Just not a greater density of fucks.  And I am sorry about that.

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