The Bat-Signal

(NOTE: Based on time elapsed since the posting of this entry, the BS-o-meter calculates this is 8.442% likely to be something that Ferrett now regrets.)

Okay. So apparently, Gotham City has a big ol’ spotlight with a bat in it that they turn on when they need Batman.  Cool.  I get that.
What do they do if there’s trouble during the day?
I mean, clearly they don’t have some other means to contact Batman, like a drop-off cell phone or something, because if they did then clearly they’d just use that and not tell everyone in Gotham where Batman was going to be in twenty minutes.  Because if I was a criminal, I’d just line that rooftop with explosives and then burn it when Batman showed up.  So clearly, this is their best bet for getting Batman to come to them, and they accept the risks of, say, Deadshot the Sniper showing up every time they activate this big glowing “BATS IS HERE” bulb.
So that means that for twelve hours of the day, and on cloudless nights, the cops have zero way of contacting Batman.  This seems like a pretty obvious workaround for criminals.  Just plan your crime at noon, and you have a nice solid eight-hour window to escape.  Assuming you have to commit your crime in Gotham at all, of course, it’s the one town with Batman, you couldn’t go to Pittsburgh or Cleveland or some other Batman-free zone to do your dirty work?  But hey, just work your dastardry while the sun’s out and Batman – who, apparently, is so disdainful of police radios that he requires a huge fucking night-light before he deigns to show up – will stay in hibernation.
You know what I’d do if I was commissioner, and had to have a big ol Bat-signal?  I’d double up.  Bat-Signal at night, Bat-Blimp during the day.  A big ol’ transparent blimp with a bat painted on it that casts a huge shadow across Gotham City.  Of course, there’s a good chance I’d do this because I’d want to say, “What?  The bank depository has been broken into?  RELEASE THE BAT-BLIMP!”  But that’s me.
 
 

4 Comments

  1. jen
    Mar 29, 2012

    “I’m too tired today for a real post…” he said, at the beginning of what is now three posts before lunch…
    😛

  2. George Galuschak
    Mar 29, 2012

    You forget that it’s always night at Gotham City. Basically, it’s so polluted/foggy that the sun comes out about five times a year. Sort of like New Jersey.
    Also, Batman doesn’t need a police radio because he’s bugged Commissioner Gordon’s office.

  3. Megan Rose Gedris
    Mar 29, 2012

    I’m doing that weird laugh where I find this hilarious but am too sick and tired to properly laugh so I’m doing these long “haaaaaaaaaaaaaaa”s that last for six seconds each.

  4. Roze Z.
    Mar 30, 2012

    Consider Batman more of a nighttime accessory.
    Daytime calls for a hero less dependent on hiding in shadows.
    He’s sort of the sparkly Twilight vampire of classic comic superheroes, after all. His real weakness is that he can’t ever let you see him for what he really is.

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