A Question That May Destroy My Sex Life Forever

(NOTE: Based on time elapsed since the posting of this entry, the BS-o-meter calculates this is 15.678% likely to be something that Ferrett now regrets.)

In a Facebook discussion, a friend of mine said that, surprisingly enough, she didn’t want to have sex with someone who’d increased his penis size via irradiated cadaver tissue implants.  She said, and I quote, it would be “creepy to be intimate with the skin of more than one person.”  Which, hey, if you don’t want to suck the nuclear zombie cock, that’s your business.
On the other hand, my mouth is full of irradiated dead men’s bones.  They flayed my gums open and dumped in bone chips scavenged from corpses (WARNING: post full of pictures) in order to build up my gum tissue enough that they could put in implants.  And, as I noted, women are far more likely to kiss me than they are to make intimate contact with Little Elvis, more’s the pity.
So.  Because I am stupidly curious about such things, which is creepier?  Kissing a guy with dead bones in his mouth, or sexing up a guy with nuclear dead men in his cock?  State your opinion, and your justification!  I want to know.


  1. Sheryl67
    Feb 3, 2012


  2. Randy Bradakis
    Feb 3, 2012

    Not going to, not going to…
    (If you’re comfortable having it inside your skin, why would I/she have a problem with it not touching mine/hers?)

  3. jen
    Feb 3, 2012

    The latter is way creepier.
    I think I might be uncomfortable fucking someone who felt the need to have their penis size increased. Meanwhile, your blood & gore surgical photos are really cool and kissing you is sexy. Is that enough justification?

    • Kellie Lynch
      Feb 3, 2012

      Yeah, that was my first thought, too. If a guy is insecure enough about his penis size that he’d attach nuclear zombie skin to his junk, I probably don’t want to fuck him.

    • TheFerrett
      Feb 3, 2012

      You don’t really need a whole lot of justification to start kissing me.

  4. Shandra
    Feb 3, 2012

    Neither bothers me particularly. I probably would find it extra interesting if the various cadaver bits endowed you with say, memories of those people’s lives or the ability to speak to dead people.
    …apparently my attraction brain is closely tied to my fiction brain. Hmmm.

    • Kelli
      Feb 3, 2012

      I thought of old, cheesy horror movies. The type where an transplanted organ was from a serial killer or satanist causing the new person to change and kill.
      Possible title: The Penis who jacked back
      No, actually that’s god awful

  5. Beth
    Feb 3, 2012

    Definitely the latter. Bones is bones and are inside, just hanging out, living or dead, dead flesh is remarkably different to living.
    And yeah, a guy who needs to have his penis size increased (presuming that he didn’t have an innie before!) is a metaphysical “eww” besides the physical. You needed the surgery to do daily things like eating and talking.

  6. Mishell Baker
    Feb 3, 2012

    I think the true creepiness factor is the -reason- behind the activity. You needed teeth; it’s a thing people generally like to have in their mouths. A person who has a zombie cock just because he wanted a bigger one… there’s deeper problems there than the source of the tissue.
    If it was someone who lost part of their doodad in an accident or something, I might be more forgiving.

  7. Amber
    Feb 3, 2012

    Okay, I think part of the creepiness of the penis implants is that they chose to do that for vanity. I wouldn’t want to date a guy with a fake anything in his cock, even if they managed to do it with something other than dead tissue.
    But the other thing is: you really can’t think too hard about this kind of stuff during sex. I mean, I’m not a major germaphobe, but I don’t really want to suck on and swallow a bunch of creepy crawlies, but that’s what semen is made of. I just can’t think about it while I’m doing it.

    • TheFerrett
      Feb 3, 2012

      Yeah, I occasionally have these moments during sex where my biological info kicks in and I have to, er swallow it back.

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