A Brief Explanation of Terms

(NOTE: Based on time elapsed since the posting of this entry, the BS-o-meter calculates this is 16.884% likely to be something that Ferrett now regrets.)

Every once in a while, it occurs to me that new readers might not know my cast of characters.  So in an attempt to summarize Who I Am and What I Do for everyone, I’ve written up a brief explanation of who’s who around here.
My Wife Gini, a.k.a. Zoethe.  
We met online in a Star Wars chat room, and proceeded to tear each other to shreds in political debates for five years straight without a scrap of romance in there anywhere.  Then my fiancee (correctly) dumped me just as Gini was getting divorced, and when I found out Gini was flirting with someone else, I sent her an email that said, summarized, “Don’t you realize the reason I’ve never flirted with you once is because I’ve been half a heartbeat away from falling in love with you?”
Her response, summarized, was, “I’m very flattered, but before I continue and potentially embarrass myself, answer one question: were you drunk when you wrote this?”
Of such greatness was a grand relationship made.  It’s been twelve years and is still awesome.
Erin and Amy
While technically my stepdaughters, I consider them my blood-kin.  Close to my heart, sadly far away in the physical world, as Erin works and Amy goes to college.  I do not blog about them much because a) I don’t consider myself a good enough parent to expound on parenting theories, and b) if they want to write about their own adventures, they should get to decide when and to whom.
La Casa McJuddMetz
Our Cleveland house, where we’ve lived for ten years now.  Named as a mashup of all of the family’s last names.  A small house, it’s been renovated recently – in fall of last year, we painted all the walls bright colors and stripped the awful rugs from the floors, and this summer we turned our kitchen into a fabulous open-area space.  Now we’re getting a new bed.  It’s like we don’t even know our home.
The Friendly Ghost At La Casa McJuddMetz
Referenced in my author profiles, we never blog about the friendly ghost.
Cleveland’s the butt of jokes, but realistically it’s also a major food capital.  Clevelanders go out to eat more than just about any other city, and the rent is way cheaper because the city’s still imploding from a lack of industry, so all of the New York chefs are coming out here to start expensive restaurants on the cheap.  Basically, Cleveland has a lot of culture (great food, arguably the third best orchestra in the world, a thriving theater district) – we’re just not snobby about it.
The Velvet Tango Room
We don’t go as often as we’d like, maybe once every two months, but Paulius serves the best drinks in the world.  They’re fifteen bucks a glass, but are designed to be stand-alone drinks with the complexity of a meal.  It’s a surprisingly low-key institution – you’d think it was a liquor store, viewed from the street – but manages to cram a casual elegance that makes it one of Cleveland’s must-stops.
The largest independent Magic: the Gathering site, where I work as a webmaster/programmer.  I wish I played Magic more, but I haven’t the time to muscle a social group back into play – and sadly, the closest store looks like this.
A six-week science-fiction and fantasy writers’ workshop, where I was reborn as a writer in 2008.  Before that, I’d been writing for twenty years, and I knew I wasn’t good enough, but I didn’t know why.  Clarion dissassembled me and put me back together, and since then I’ve published nineteen stories.  Hopefully a novel.  My life’s goal is to publish a novel.  At which point I’m sure my life’s goal will mutate into publishing a successful novel.  (I note they’re accepting applications right now.)
Gini and I are polyamorous, and while I’ll discuss aspects of polyamory, I tend to be very low on the personal details of who I’m dating, mainly because my blog’s a relatively big stage and I don’t like dragging people on here.  I’ve seen some high-profile bloggers have problems with rhapsodizing about Their Glorious New Poly Love and then when the breakup comes, everyone takes sides and I suspect it’s that much worse for the poor bastard who’s now broken up with… so while I have lots of love, I don’t go into specifics.  I’m convinced this is the reason our poly relationships last so long, because polyamorous relationships are like dog years in that one year equals seven.
I have two “core” relationships, who are sufficiently close that they have veto power over who I’m allowed to see because a) they’re entrusted with my best interests, and b) if they’re not happy, I’m not happy.  Gini and I also see other people, who we love, but we don’t necessarily have to run things past them, just keep them apprised.
Bec is our local “core” girlfriend, who Gini and I have been dating for about three years now.  She lives in Cleveland, and we have weekly dates as well as doing much Stuff on the weekends.
Angie is our long-distance “core” girlfriend who lives in Detroit, and we’ve also been dating for three glorious years.  We see her maybe once every two months, which is never enough.
That’s pretty much a summary of what’s going on.  Any questions you have about my life you wanted to have clarified?  Now’s your chance.

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