Herman Cain Pisses Me Off

So allegedly, when a woman asked Herman Cain how he could help her find a job, he pushed her head towards his crotch.  This claim, the fourth in a series, may be enough to sink Herman Cain’s run for President.
This pisses me off.
Look, don’t get me wrong, I’m as down on rape and sexual harassment as anyone.  If the accusations are true, Herman Cain’s a scumbag, and he’s not getting any invites to my birthday parties.
But really?  Herman Cain’s blatantly awful 9-9-9 tax code wasn’t enough to scuttle his chances?  His ignorance that China already has nuclear weapons?  The many other dumb-ass ideas he’s floated aren’t enough to take him out of the candidacy?  Look, I get everyone says something dumb from time to time, and when a million cameras are trained upon you, they’re going to catch every brain fart you have and magnify it.  But Cain’s been consistently numb-nutted enough that it should be apparent that this is a habit.
In a sane world, voters would have analyzed the 9-9-9 plan and gone, “As stated, that’s actually going to cost the average taxpayers more money, give the rich more cash, and take in less money overall than our current system.”  And the majority would have said, “A dude like that doesn’t have the brainpower to make it as President,” and would have chucked him out on his ear.
But no.  What’s killing him in the polls?  Evil sex.  Because the voters of America don’t give a good goddamned if you can’t add two numbers together as long as you’re a nice guy… But yhe minute your personal character’s in question, then you’re not fit.
Here’s the deal: I don’t want a scumbag rapist in office who takes advantage of his position to try to force women to suck his dick.  But that’s the lowest level, on a par with the obvious statement of “NO SERIAL KILLERS PLS.”  That should be our last level of filter, not our only filter.
Because I don’t want a guy who can’t do math in the Oval Office, either.  I don’t want an ignoramus there.  I don’t want a guy who is almost willfully ignorant of international issues.  I want a guy who knows what the fuck he’s doing.
But unfortunately, at this stage of the game, it doesn’t matter how fucking stupid you are.  The only way to get a definitive knock-out is to try to put your dick in the wrong place.  It’s as though we’re trying to elect not a President, but a Nicest Guy In Chief.
I know a lot of nice guys.  Many of them are incompetent.  Can I be so bold as to ask for a maybe-not-so-nice-but-not-a-rapist-either competent dude?  From either party?  Thank you.